Beyer on the bottle-wank

Big Brother contestant Kinga apparently committed a love-act with a bottle of Jacobs Creek on Tuesday night, and Ofcom has received about 80 complaints as a result, The Guardian reports.

The reporter consulted Mediawatch-UK’s John Beyer for some wise words on the topic:

Channel 4 is a public service broadcaster that has high aspirations for quality and innovation but this sort of indecent pornographic behaviour shows Big Brother for what it really is, which is just to be controversial

was the ungrammatical contribution from the self-appointed defender of “the beautiful English language.”

He went on to criticise Ofcom for letting standards slip:

The regulator is not fulfilling its role, it seems to me that in terms of after 9pm they won’t do anything

said the man who bemoans the decline in communication skills among the young, and blames the media for it. In terms of after 9pm? Maybe the boy Beyer is watching too much telly.

Both Kinga and Channel 4 have subsequently denied that any improper relations with the forementioned bottle occurred. Whatever the case may be, the scene was edited in such a way as to leave everything to the imagination – so MWW can only conclude that those who complained about it must have extraordinarily filthy imaginations.


16 Responses to “Beyer on the bottle-wank”

  1. Dan Factor says:

    Has it ever occured to Beyer that if he keeps moaning about how disgusting Big Brother apparently is it will only generate the show more publicity?
    Channel 4 and Endemol are looking for as much outrage from disgusted middle England as possible and the more they piss of Mediawatch UK and the Daily Mail the more sucsseful they think they will be.
    If Beyer wants Big Brother to disapear he would do better than to starve it from the oxygen of publicity and resist his urge to give his two pence worth in the mainstream press everytime something “controversial” happens on it.
    But he needs to keep given quotes to the media in order to publicise his pressure group and get the paying memebers in.

  2. tom p says:

    He is clearly a cynical moron

  3. Retired Rambler says:

    This can’t be the same bright chap Beyer who predicted,when the uncut version of Natural Born Killers was released by Warners in 2001, copycat violence could flood our streets?
    t

  4. huh says:

    Wasn’t Kinga kicked out like one day after she went in the house, like a month ago?

  5. Hector says:

    Kinga is still there it seems (or did she leave then come back?).

    I must confess to not actually watching BB, although I did feel obliged to download the video of the Jacob’s Creek incident purely for research purposes.

    It all looked innocent enough to me, I think the poor girl had lost her bottle opener.

  6. Marc says:

    I think Big Brother is crap, personally and it encourages this sort of behaviour because it’s about the only thing that keeps the viewing figures up.

    Is this: http://tinyurl.com/aojmn the article you’re alluding to Rambler? It seems to feature a picture of the grand bigot himself; remind me not to leave my children alone with him. On second thoughts, I’ll threaten them with this picture next time they misbehave.

  7. Ah says:

    It seems she has been brought back on. Seen some pics, and all i can say is i am definitly in favour of encoruaging more Polish and Kuwaiti people to move here and have children together.

  8. Marc says:

    Here’s what he needs to install on his telly, pc and any source of outside influence…

    http://www.hootisland.com/stuff/safe.html

    Or maybe he should just have a blindfold and earmuffs surgically attached to his bonce.

  9. tom p says:

    I don’t watch big brother because it simply is voyeuristic trash full of tedious morons intent on self-promotion. However, according to the guardian’s report of this, she was voted out by the other tards, but brought back to add a little more tension into the dynamic, and ‘cos she’s a desperate slapper who’ll get them some more press coverage from the predictably rentaquote likes of beyer

  10. Andy L says:

    Kinga came into the house a month ago with Eugine and Orlaith, but they were segregated into a seperate section and didn’t get to mix with the other housemates (except for Makosi, who had to give them food). After a few days Makosi was forced to choose two to get introduced to the house proper, with one person getting effectively evicted before they went in. That person was Kinga. However, when Orlaith walked out of the show last week (rather than being evicted), they were left a person short, so Kinga was effecively made re-eligable by default and was put in the house.

    So now you know. And in the immortal words of Action Force, knowing is half the battle.

  11. Retired Rambler says:

    Marc,
    Fury over killer vids

    An uncut version of the controversial film Natural Born Killers will finally be available on video tomorrow despite fears that it could lead to copycat attacks. The video release of the film in which 52 people die was delayed for five years after the Dunblane Massacre. But Warner Brothers claim a lot of people still want to see it. John Beyer, of pressure group mediawatch-uk said: “There are not enough bad things to say about this movie. It glamorises drugs, violence, gun use, under age sex and incest”. Sunday Mirror 8/7/2001
    http://tinyurl.com/8qj94

  12. Dan Factor says:

    I would love to invite John Beyer into my home and for him to go through my dvd and video collection. I am sure he would find many films he thinks I should not be allowed to watch on the basis they might corrupt me.

  13. Christopher Shell says:

    If everything was above board, why did they need to ‘edit’ it, or ‘leave [anything] to the inmagination’ in the first place? Or are you just referring to the normal editing process whereby highlights are obtained? It is the whole concept of BB that leads to such incidents being inevitable in the first place.

  14. Marc says:

    Cheers Rambler. As I recall, NBK was a pretty crap film anyway, I don’t really know what the fuss was about – Oly Stone is a very variable director. Obviously I didn’t pay it (NBK) sufficient attention because I don’t remember it glamorising incest or under-age sex. I guess I’ll have to go and rent it to re-examine the evidence.

  15. Marc says:

    What makes me laugh with BB is the way it encourages outrageous behaviour by mixing a bunch of specially picked odd-balls and leaving them all locked up in a largely closed system and pretty much to their own devices. If this was done as a proper psychological experiment it would probably attract a lot of criticism.

    I guffawed heartily when I heard that a contestant had done an impression of the grossly unfunny Avid Merrion (aka Leigh Francis) and *insulted* “big brother” – actually a young, female researcher. (I don’t like Merrion not because he’s offensive or debases celebrities, but that he’s about as a funny as a road accident.) At the time, while convulsing with laughter all I could think of was, “What the hell do they expect?”

    How sarcastic and puerile of the producers to admonish the guilty contestant for offending the poor girl’s sensibilities. Sounds to me like Frankenstien telling his off his monster for killing people; or feeding the dog baked beans and then complaining when it farts.

    It would be interesting to lock up Beyer and some of his mates in the big brother house to see how long they can retain an air of sanity. Better still, just lock him up.

  16. Paul says:

    it makes me laugh that Beyer goes on about decency and yet he is a long term bodybuilder and no doubt spends many hours each week pumping iron around other people and showing his massive body of in gym mirrors.