Beyer and Reid enjoy day in The Sun

In accordance with MWW prophecy The Sun today miraculously produced a story out of thin air by phoning up “Bishop” Michael Reid of the Christian Congress for Traditional Values, and Massah John Beyer of Mediawatch-UK to ask their opinion of a Channel 4 magic show.

The Magic of Jesus features magicians Barry Jones and Stuart McLeod reproducing New Testament “miracles” such as raising a corpse from the dead, curing a blind person, feeding 5,000 football fans with five loaves of bread and two fishes, walking on water, and making a virgin pregnant.

The insurance-salesman-cum-bishop mustered some suitable indignation for Sun readers to enjoy:

The big difference between a couple of tricksters performing illusions and Our Lord’s miracles is that Jesus actually healed people, raised the dead and forgave sins.


Maybe these two fraudsters could try being crucified to see if they can rise three days later.

What a fantastic idea, Bish! You won’t complain when it’s on Channel 4’s Easter schedule next year, will you?

Massah John Beyer also muttered something about causing offence, but his words were too overwhelmingly dull to quote here.

Good to see the Mercedes-driving bish back in the papers though. He must have been starting to feel neglected.

4 Responses to “Beyer and Reid enjoy day in The Sun

  1. craig says:

    glad to hear he is still alive, no wait, i aren’t. this paticular show sounds dumb, but i’ll watch it anyway, safe in teh knowledge that some christians somewhere are being offended and writing strongly worded letters. *sighs contently*

  2. Dan Factor says:

    Channel 4 are right to pock fun at relegious beliefs that revolve around “miracles”.
    Miracles are nothing but fantasy! Jesus did not heel people, raise the dead or anything like that.
    It’s all a load of fantasy. These Christians are probably offended because Channel 4 are exposing their beliefs for what they are… utter rubbish!

  3. “Jesus actually healed people, raised the dead and forgave sins” – I’d like proof of one and two, and as for three: I forgive everyone their sins. Am I holy now?

  4. Mike says:

    ” When Jesus raised his eyes and saw that a large crowd was coming to him, he said to Philip, “Where can we buy enough food for them to eat?” 6 He said this to test them, because he himself knew what he was going to do… 9 There is a boy here who has five barely loaves and two fish; but what good are these for so many. 10 Jesus said, “Have the people recline.” Now there was a great deal of grass in that place. So the men reclined about five thousand in number.”

    Feeding the five thousand? oldest trick in the book, why christians can’t see this never ceases to amaze me, the ‘great deal of grass’ is the giveaway, so easy for the miraculous loaves and fishes to have been concealed in the grass, ready to be produced at a moments notice, the ‘miracle’ is further exposed as a sham a little later, when Jesus is asked to repeat it the next day, this one he wasn’t expecting, and could only waffle on about bread from heaven…

    “For the bread of God is that which comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.” 34 So they said to him, “Sir, give us this bread always.” 35 Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me will never hunger, and whoever believes in me will never thirst”

    Possibly the first recorded illusionist in history, pity his scams have caused untold misery to millions down the ages….